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Sunday, July 17, 2011

Jackson Update

I am way behind in posting so I hope to get a little caught up.

At the beginning, Dr.s predicted that Jax would be in the hospital for about 12 weeks. And we were prepared to be in SLC for that long. We had our apartment, Neil had moved offices to work out of SLC, and we even had trips to the zoo and Lagoon planned. On Carter's birthday, while here in Logan one of Jackson's Doctors called us to give us the update on him that day, since we wouldn't be in. She mentioned how well he was doing and blah blah. Then she continued with "And since he's doing so well, there is no reason why he can't go home next week." I was speechless. It had only been 4.5 weeks. He had just been moved to the Infant Unit 4 days earlier. So his release was set for the next Friday and boy were we happy. Happy but still not really believing the news. We only told a couple of people in fear of jinxing ourselves. We didn't even tell our landlord. Then came Tuesday. In came the Drs on their daily rounds. Then came, "we've decided that there is no reason to wait til Friday to release you. Would you like to go home tomorrow?" And the answer was YES! We packed up our whole apartment in record time, cleaned like crazy people and were ready to go Wednesday.


Jackson had a great last night's sleep in his hospital bed.

Grandma Susan was present for the good news that day and helped to pack and clean.

There were tons of last minute things to sign, learn and do before we could leave. We didn't get to leave until almost 6 pm. It was a long, long day.


Jackson was not as excited as we were apparently. Jackson is a particular little guy. He HATES to be unswaddled. Even though its warm and toasty inside he needs that comfort of being tightly swaddled.
Here is proof. Swaddle him up and he goes right to sleep. A binky never hurts either.

Here we are finally ready to leave the hospital after 37 days. But who is counting right?!
I wish the story ended there. I wish I could write that it was happily ever after. But it wasn't, and it isn't. The first day home was HARD. I didn't get a shower for 48 hours. And I won't mention how many hours I went without brushing my teeth. It was significantly shorter than 48 though.

Jackson required a lot of care. He has to eat every 3 hours along with all his other care. He has 2 pieces of "hardware" on his stomach that need almost constant care it seems. Changing bags, changing dressings, along with other newborn basic care. Plus he's hooked up to 3 different pumps. Which all needed their lines changed daily.

Good thing he is so cute which helps to block out minimal sleep and 6 loads of laundry a day.
Carter is enjoying having him home. He is slightly indifferent to him but does occasionally want to kiss him and interact with him.
Here is Jackson's Life Flight shirt he received from being transported the 200 steps from the U to Primary's. It only cost $1800. What an expensive shirt!

After his first bath at home. Which he hated. And still hates. He has to have sponge baths for now because of the Central Line which is in his left arm. It cannot get wet. I cannot wait for the day he can splash around in the tub. I'm sure he will enjoy that much more.


Here is a rare picture of Jackson dressed. We've decided that it really isn't worth it to dress him. Getting to all the stuff on his stomach and not to mention all the leaking......it's just easier to put a diaper on him and wrap him up.

Carter helping to feed brother before bed. I think it was an excuse to stay up a bit later. But it made for a cute picture!

Now comes 4 days after being released from Primarys...........

That's right. June 27th Jackson goes back to the hospital with an infection in his PICC line in his arm. I got up to feed him in the middle of the night and he felt quite warm. I got out the thermometer and sure enough....102 degrees. The Drs warned us about how common these infections were and that most people end up back in the hospital. We just never thought after 4 days.

Luckily our wonderful pediatrician was familiar and comfortable in treating this type of infection so we didn't have to return to Primarys. It wasn't fun being back in the hospital but was much nicer being 2 miles from home vs 90 miles. The nurses at Logan had never seen a case quite like Jackson's so we were in charge of most of his care, but ended up teaching them how to do it. It's crazy that we are so knowledgeable about these types of things.



We did end up back at Primary's to have a new PICC placed. Logan thought they could place one but I felt more comfortable with Primary's doing it. Notice 2 things about this picture. 1) the IV in his head. Poor guy kept blowing thru veins and his veins are so tiny that the best ones ended up being in his head. 2)the little truck thing on his stomach. This is called a "Freddy the Frog." They use them in the NICU. It's basically like a bean bag that helps them feel more swaddled, more secure. Jackson is addicted to them. So luckily Grandma Susan traced the pattern and made her own. It is a life saver for my baby.
After 8 days in the hospital Jackson is back home in his own crib. And we've been here ever since. The days seem to either be really good or REALLY BAD. We love him dearly but it is truly exhausting taking care of him. Physically and emotionally.
A close up of the head vein. The night before we left Primary's for the second time he got his first blood transfusion. But probably not his last. Because of having a short gut he doesn't have as much intestine to absorb nutrients and specifically Iron like we do. So he is a bit anemic. He received 40 mL of Packed Red Blood cells and boy did it make a difference. He pinked right up. He also has a bit of a heart murmur which is common in newborns, but also common in someone who is anemic. The Drs are confident that as he gets bigger and better, his murmur will go away.

Leaving Primary's for the second time. I dressed him in the same going home outfit for good luck.

Now that we are home again we are trying to settle in to a routine. Our insurance covers Home Health nurses to come to our house for whatever we need them for. Right now they come once a week to draw his blood and to change the dressing on his arm. Everything else, we do. But it is nice to know that we can call someone if needs be. Jackson is up to eating 56 mL every 3 hours. To give you a reference, 60 mL is 2 ounces. So in a few days he will be eating 2 ounces every 3 hours. The normal for his weight and age is about 90 mL so we are still working up to that. The drs are amazed that he can even eat that much at a time. People always ask why he can't eat as much as he wants, whenever he wants. It's because he had major bowel surgery and it takes a long time for the bowels to heal. Plus, with him having a short gut he has less "room" to absorb nutrients and stuff like that. We have to work up slowly to avoid overwhelming his gut and make it shut down. Too much, too fast runs the risk of diarrhea and dehydration. He has had none of these yet and is doing amazing. In a few weeks he should be at full feeds if things continue like they are. The TPN he receives through his PICC line, in his veins, supplement what he is missing orally. He is gaining weight. Slowly, but surely. He's gained more weight than they thought for this point and they decrease his TPN weekly as he continues to gain.

Because he can't eat until he's full, he does feel a bit hungry. And a hungry baby=a crying baby. It's heartbreaking to not be able to give him what he wants but I trust the doctors and their expertise. Jackson really only has 2 levels....sleeping or Screaming. He doesn't really fuss or cry. He screams. And it is very draining. But you can't blame the poor baby one bit. He's just hungry. He wants to be held very frequently so most of my day is spent holding in his binky(his life saver) and rocking him. Because he is attached to 3 different pumps I can't walk him around or go from room to room. I have to sit on the couch. Imagine what my house looks like most days.

Last week brought our first checkup back at Primarys. Jackson met with his surgeon, his GI doctor and had a dye study done. His dye study was to see the size of his bowels and how they are doing. As a refresher, the top part of his small intestine was HUGE at birth, because of the blockage. The bottom part was teeny tiny because nothing was passing through. So we are waiting until the top part and bottom part because closer to the same size. The dye study would show if any progress had been made.

Neil and Jackson on the big table getting ready for the study. Many nurses and Doctors have commented on Neil and how hands on he is. They say how most often the dads sit in the background and let the mom do all the work. Not Neil. He does as much as I do. He can do every single care that I do with Jackson. He is as comfortable with it as I am. He gets right in and gets things done. I'm very grateful for his help and his engineering background to help me figure out how to best tape or situate a certain tube!

During the dye study they need dye to be in the stomach and watch with X-rays as it moves around in his stomach. There are 2 ways to get dye in there......drink it with a bottle or have it forced down your throat with a tube. The nurses were certain that Jax wouldn't drink the dye because it tastes horrible. We were certain that he WOULD drink it. Jax will eat anything put in front of him. Even his nasty Iron medicine is a treat to him. And sure enough, Jax downed that bottle of dye like it was fresh, warm breastmilk. And the best part for him, he had NO limit!! He drank over 2 ounces. Sure made the nurses job a bit easier. He didn't make one peep the whole time he was on that table. Makes me excited for when he can eat to his hearts content.

The dye study showed some great news....the bottom part of the bowel has grown and caught up to the size of a normal 2 month old. The human body is amazing. The top part is still quite dilated but they don't think that will ever shrink to normal size. So the plan is to "reconnect" him next month. We are so excited for that surgery. There may be one surgery after that to taper down the bowel but this is what we've been waiting for. This surgery will get rid of all the hardware on his stomach. He will most likely still be on TPN feedings for a bit because they will have to restart his oral feeds again while the bowel recovers again from surgery and learns to work all together. We found out that the procedures done on Jax have only ever been done on one other baby at Primarys. And he had a heart condition that didn't allow him to live very long so they didn't see the end result. There is no one else to really compare his progress to because he is paving the way. The things the surgeon did were truly amazing. The hope after the surgery is that he will live a normal, healthy life. No one will ever know he is missing most of his small intestine. We are hoping that worst case scenario is that he can't eat spicy nachos at Taco Bell. Cross your fingers.

We are just praying for the patience to make it through one more month. And we will make it. You're never given more than you can handle....right? As we checked out after our appt tuesday the nurse at the front desk asked if this was our miracle baby. I liked that. He is a miracle. Our miracle that we love very much and would do this all again for. I've decided that he is "Perfectly Imperfect." There is some reason he was sent to earth this way and we are very grateful he is here and in our family.

Monday, June 27, 2011

My 3 Year Old

Where has time gone? How is it that this sweet baby below has turned 3? What a great 3 years. What a great little boy.

His birthday was on June 16th and we were still living in SLC at this point so did a little celebrating that day and saved the big party for the next day in Logan. We spent a lot of the day at the hospital but the nurses made sure and made Carter feel special. They decorated a poster for him and gave him a balloon. It made his day. He was telling everyone it was his birthday and when they'd wish him happy birthday, he'd reply "You're Welcome!"

For Carter, turning 3 means having a small meltdown everytime I ask him to pose for a picture.
After a small bribe this is the picture I got:

These were just a couple of early birthday presents before the big ones. Of course it couldn't be a Carter moment without some CARS paraphernalia. But also a smoothie maker for his kitchen..with sound effects. Loud ones!


We headed to Logan the next day for a birthday party fit for a 3 year old. We started off the morning with Mickey Mouse pancakes, and another meltdown over the picture. (He totally gets his photogenic side from his father!)

Then we set off to make his dream cake. We found the tutorial over 6 months ago and we'd been waiting for this day for a long time. Carter was more than willing to help me make his cake.
Finally a happy picture of the Birthday Boy.
He got this wonderful bouquet of balloons from his Aunt Linsey. I'm still trying to convince him that we can get rid of them now....

Now for the big reveal......THE CAKE Carter's been dreaming of for months. Let's go back and reminisce about Carter's first 2 birthday cake debacles....

Birthday #1. What was suppose to be a big basketball turned out to be the commercial "This is your brain....This is your brain on drugs." It still tasted good though.

Birthday #2 that looked like a small child made this cake. Poor guy.


And Finally: The One where the cake turned out like planned....

The race car cake. Carter was so happy with it and especially the checkered flags. He wanted to poke the whole sack of them all over the cake. I couldn't let him do it until I'd taken pictures of my masterpiece.
And then the Party started with presents. He received so many wonderful things. Books, puzzles, games, etc etc.
After all his time in the hospital with Jackson he received his very own medical kit. He went straight for the scissors and tried some horrible looking procedure on Neil.

Then came the Pinata that we had planned and longed for. I took him to the party store and let him pick out which pinata he wanted. He fittingly picked a Race car one. I sneakily steered him away from the real CARS ones because they were 3 times as much!

The 3 kids all loved the pinata. Too bad for Neil that we don't have any trees in our yard and he had to hold the pinata.

Carter was still excited even when it wasn't his turn.

Birthday Cake time. Carter had been making us sing happy birthday to him all week. He loved the attention. He was so excited to play with all his toys that he didn't even ask for seconds. Which is rare for Carter.

Learning correct form with his t-ball set. We've got a lefty here but can bat right handed if you make him.
Family portrait after the big party. Happy Birthday Carter. We love you.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

The Day Has Come....

They told us 12 weeks. It's been 5. I can't believe the day is finally here. They are releasing Jackson from the hospital tomorrow (Wednesday) and we get to bring him home. Home home. Home to Logan. We've waited such a long time for this day. I can't wait to post pictures of Jackson leaving the hospital and sleeping in his own bed. More details later.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

4 weeks old

My sweet baby is 4 weeks old today. I can't believe that much time has passed already. I try not to think about how he has been in a hospital since day 1, and will continue to be in a hospital for many more days. Instead, we decided to celebrate NICU style.

First: we had some professional pictures taken. In the NICU. With all his cords and dungeon like crib. We weren't hiding anything. This is his life (for now) and we wanted to document it in its entirety. The photographer was nice enough to send me 1 picture while she gets all the rest done. This was seriously only the 2nd picture she took. He gave a nice baby smile. And best of all, we caught one of his darling dimples. He has another dimple on the other side but we've yet to catch that.






I'm so glad there are photographers out there willing to come in to the hospital and capture pictures for me.

Secondly: DRUM ROLL PLEASE:

Jackson is no longer a patient in the Newborn Intensive Care Unit! He was transferred to the Infant Unit. This is such a huge step in getting Jax home. The surgeon kept telling us that he wanted him out of the NICU because "Jackson is not sick. The NICU is for critically sick babies." So when we got the word that he was being transferred I was so happy. His care is being taken over by the GI (gastrointestinal) doctors who specialize in his exact problem. We loved the Dr.s in the NICU but they aren't specialists in babies who are missing large portions of intestine. And fittingly, Jackson's new Dr. is named Dan Jackson. The GI doctors are very gung ho and optimistic about his care and their plan for him. They want to keep increasing his feeds by mouth to where hopefully, hopefully, he can try nursing until he's full. Maybe even next week. The hardest thing about all of this is seeing my poor baby hungry and not being able to do anything about it. He loves to eat(he is an etherington) and when you only get 1 tsp every 3 hours, you want more. Lately he's been getting a little fussy at night because he is plain ole hungry. It breaks my heart as I try my hardest to console him. Luckily, he does calm pretty quickly and a binkie and some snuggling will distract him. Our biggest goal in this transfer is .........getting Jackson home. The end is finally in sight. Not as in this week, or next week, or the next.....but we are hoping to have our family together by this time next month. We are keeping our fingers crossed.
Here is Jackson's new room. Lovely, sterile, and white. But PRIVATE!! That lovely chair in the back is where we can sleep or nap if needed. We even have our own TV, DVD player and private bathroom. It is so different than being in the NICU. At the NICU there were 6 babies in one room with a nurse constantly at their bedside(which wasn't a bad thing necessarily). Now we have our own room where we can shut the door, be all together, be a little louder and have more privacy. The nurses don't come in unless there is a reason to while parents are there. That being said, when we are gone, they visit his room frequently, rock him when he needs it and take wonderful care of him. It's a little strange getting use to the big differences between units and we miss a couple of Jackson's wonderful nurses who became our friends. But we're so thankful for his progress and hope to keep sailing along the road to coming home!

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Is it June Yet?

This little boy finally moved to Salt Lake with us last week! We are so excited to all be back together again. This new situation has been a little rough on Carter and part of his coping mechanisms has been to sleep with as many stuffed animals as he can find. He literally will not go to bed without these 3 animals. They really have been the only stable thing in his life lately:)


His 3rd birthday is next week and he is very excited. He asks me everyday "Is it June Yet?" We have been planning his party for months now and we almost have all the details worked out. We are going home to Logan to celebrate because I know that will be happiest there. And that way cousins and grandparents can attend. Luckily he is still little enough that he doesn't care that we aren't inviting friends and we aren't going all out because we don't have time.
Before Jackson was born I was hoping that he'd be home by Carter's birthday but that isn't going to happen. I guess we'll just throw another big party when he finally comes home!



Look who weighs a whopping 7.5 pounds......

Jax is finally starting to put on weight and really fill out. Just overnight he lost that tiny newborn look and now has fuller cheeks and the start of a double chin. I've never been happier to see full cheeks on my little boy!



He is the most consolable baby. The nurses all appreciate that about him. If he is a little fussy all you have to do is swaddle him up tight and put his binky in, and he's out.

His binky is almost the same size as his face but he refuses to take the smaller sized binky. This picture shows his right PICC line in his arm. These are the only lines/wires he has attached to his body. This is how he gets his nutrition through his veins.

Since Carter moved up with us he has been spending a lot of time at the hospital with us. He is such a good boy while we are there. While Neil is at work he will sit by me in the rocking chair and read his books or play with his toys. He can usually last for about 60-80 minutes which is great for me. I can still spend lots of time with Jackson.


Jackson is up to eating 7 mL every 3 hours. A measly 1 1/2 tsp per feeding. He use to be a little upset after eating so little and felt unsatisfied. But now he has really gotten use to that amount and will give a hearty burp and fall right back to sleep. He does wolf down that tiny bottle as quickly as possible though.

The best news is that Jackson had surgery yesterday. It was a good surgery(if there is such a thing). The tube that feeds his lower bowel fell out (for the second time) on Monday. The surgeon decided to try and see if he could get the biggest size tube in there. The surgery was successful and the tube was placed. The dr. told us that he needed this size tube to eventually come home so we are one little step closer.

We are not ready to come home yet, but things have been going remarkably well. The surgeon told us that Jackson is doing as well as they could have hoped. But not to get to excited because there are bound to be setbacks. I of course, hope to be the exception and have everything go "perfectly" for my baby. We will see. He has made great progress and continues to poop and show us that his colon does in fact work and function.



Here he is all snuggled up before surgery in his heated blankets and sleeping through everything.

After surgery picture. Completely out! He had to be intubated during surgery but they were able to pull the breathing tube immediately after surgery and he never needed any assistance. What a strong little boy! The stretchy gauze around his tummy is to hold the new tube in place. The surgeon did tell the nurses, and I quote "I will meet the person who pulls this tube out at the gates of Hell." So we are all hoping it stays in like planned.
Here he is down having a dye study done. They injected dye into his body to see if his bowels had grown at all and they HAD!! The human body is so amazing and especially an infant's body. Adult's bowels can not grow in size so if they had Jax's condition, it would be permanent. But babies can grow their bowels and Jackson is doing just that. Everything is looking great for the future when he can be "Put back together!"