Pictures

With both boys' birthdays coming up I decided professional pictures were in order.  I prepped very carefully for this day.  Plenty of naps that day, plenty of food, and plenty of bribes.  And wouldn't you know that both boys starting crying/whining the minute the camera came out?  Carter was his typical "I hate pictures self" but Jackson was a whole new person.  He cried the second I put him down and wanted to be held constantly.  He had big fat tears running down his cheeks almost the entire hour.  How Melissa managed to capture some half smiles I will never know.  Even though Jax isn't giving his biggest smiles, he is still cute.  And Carter managed to throw some smiles in as well.  In between the sobbing of each and every balloon popping in a span of about 7 minutes.  

 She told him to stand with his hands in his pockets.....

There we go.  Found the right pockets.

Finally a genuine smile.

He is so addicted to this monkey/binkie that it's not even funny.

Happy Birthday

We had quite the celebrations for Jackson for his first birthday.  We had 3 separate parties for him with different people and on different days.

We started out the weekend before his birthday with my parents.  Jackson wasn't too in to opening presents but he did love what was inside them.  

 Carter was thrilled to be the designated present opener.  He took his job VERY seriously and didn't waste any time.

He got a talking birthday cake and birthday book from my parents.  He loves them.  And so does Carter.  Carter reminds me daily that "It's good to share huh Mom?"  Meaning, I will play with these toys whenever I want because I am the older brother.

 He's only torn one of the pop-up flaps off so far.  Pretty good for a one year old

 We started our his official birthday, Thursday with a rousing round of Happy Birthday and his Home Health Nurse Missy brought him a darling bouquet of balloons.  Which Carter promptly took over as well!

We celebrated at lunch time as well with some hot dogs and beans.  Jackson ate an entire hot dog all by himself.

Since Jackson cannot have birthday cake, or anything sweet even, I decided to not focus his Birthday celebration that night around cake.  Our little family decided to hit up our favorite restaurant, Wendy's to celebrate.  And by "our" favorite I mean Carter and Jax's favorite!  They have a great allergy friendly menu for my 2 boys so we went there for a birthday dinner.

Jackson put away an entire hamburger patty and several of Carter's fries, much to his chagrin.  But remember, it's good to share!

 Me and my 2 boys worn out from all our celebrating!

Saturday morning brought Jax's big birthday party.

Carter was so excited to help me in the kitchen.  He insisted on wearing his apron like me.  His "helping" consisted of swiping his finger in the frosting so I had to redo the frosting.  

Neil and I didn't plan to wear matching shirts on this day but it kind of happened.  

 I didn't get a shot of everyone attending but we had so many family members come to support and show their love to Jackson during the 2 parties.  Above is Aunt Linsey and Grandpa E.

And our HH Nurse Missy again who is a part of our family.  We love her and so does Jackson.

My favorite part of the party was the game Neil and I LOVINGLY invented.  Maybe we'll play it each and every year.  It was "Pin the ostomy bag on the baby."  In case you forgot, Jackson had an ostomy for the first 3.5 months of his life.  I became quite the pro at changing those things(not to toot my own horn, but I was DANG good.)  Those ostomy bags were a source of many, many tears and frustration in our house.  I HATED THEM with a passion.  The basic idea of an ostomy bag is to take off the sticker and it just sticks and you go on your merry way.  False.  You can change them up to 14 times in a day.  And yes I counted.  

A couple months ago I was clearing out supplies that we no longer needed and I came across several boxes of bags.  My first reaction was "Oh these bags are soo cute and little."  Obviously I had forgotten about the torture they brought to our house.  Now I just view them as a great thing.

 Each person got a bag and had to pin it on the baby.  And apparently ostomy bags stick a lot better to cardboard babies than real babies.  Go figure.  Here is Tyler giving it a shot.

 And Grandpa got a turn

And in true Carter character he threw a fit about doing it and had to be bribed.  And refused to wear the bandana over his eyes.  So he just did it with his eyes closed(kind of!)

And big shocker........I won with the bag closest to the ostomy(red dot).  I didn't even have a prize for the winner.  If I had known I would win, I would have made sure it was a fantastic gift!

Then on to presents where once again Carter helped.  Jackson didn't care about the wrapping paper like I thought he would but loved the little things inside.

 Thanks to everyone who came and brought gifts and helped us celebrate our wonderful little boy.  We couldn't have made it through this year without the support and help from our wonderful families and friends.

Then on to the best part of the party.  The food.  The theme was "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" because Jax really is a hungry little guy and like the caterpillar, his life revolves somewhat about food.

 I got all my ideas from the internet but none of them turned out as perfect and cute as the internet pictures.  Craftiness and cuteness is not my forte!

Our rainbow fruit dish.  The color green is missing because grapes were like 4$ a pound and I didn't want to pay that much!

Caterpillar cupcakes

Caterpillar sandwiches.

Our Happy Little Family.

I was a little bummed that Jax didn't get to experience cake that normal babies but I tried not to dwell on that.  And luckily he didn't mind.

Even when Catherine ate her cupcake in front of him.  Kidding

 Brothers sharing a new gift.  Who knew gifts aimed towards a one year old would entertain Carter so much as well.  This stand came with a phone and Carter is addicted to phones lately so he quickly took that over and started in on his long distance calling.

Happy Birthday to my sweet baby.  We are so proud of everything you have accomplished in your 1 year of life.  You are so strong, so brave, and so amazing in every way.  I am in awe of your patience and resilience.  

I think Elder Rasband quoted it perfectly in April's conference:

“A perfect body is not required to achieve a divine destiny. In fact, some of the sweetest spirits are housed in frail frames. …"

Here's to many, many more birthday parties!

365 days

365 days ago my life changed forever.  For good and for bad.  But mostly good.  My heart grew 2 sizes as I welcomed my baby boy to this earth.  I didn't even know if we would ever celebrate his 1st birthday.

It was such a happy day and such a heartbreaking day, all in one.  My sweet baby, born with a broken body.  A condition that has no cure, no days off, and what seems to be no relief.  While his body is somewhat broken, his spirit and determination are not.  He was a fighter, and still is a fighter.  He has endured more in his 365 days then most of us will in a lifetime.  And yet he still smiles, still laughs, and still fights.

At first the burden I carried seemed too large.  Too heavy.  How could we (Jax specifically) be asked to bear such a heavy burden?  If I can teach Jackson one thing, and one thing only I hope to teach him what I believe, know to be true.  He doesn't have to carry this burden alone.  He doesn't even have to carry all of the burden himself.  He has a loving Savior who will shoulder most of the burden if we let him.

The past 365 days have been so hard but so great.  We have seen miracle after miracle.  I've always believed in miracles.  After Jax was born I prayed for a miracle.  Prayed for the miracle of healing.  I knew the Lord could heal him from his broken body completely.  But he didn't.  And he won't.  I've come to accept that.  My favorite Conference talk of all time is called "But If Not...."  Basically stating that we will have faith that things will turn out how we want.  But If Not......carry on, still believing.  We are carrying on and recognizing all the miracles that have come our way.  And they have been plentiful.

I found a poem a little while ago that says perfectly what I would like to say.

I Still Would Have Chosen You

If before you were born, I could have gone to Heaven and saw all the beautiful souls, I still would have chosen you.

If God had told me, "this soul will one day need extra care and needs", I still would have chosen you...

If He had told me, "that one day this soul may make my heart bleed", I still would have chosen you...

If He had told me, "this soul would make me question the depth of my faith", I still would have chosen you...

If He had told me, "this soul would make tears flow from my eyes that would overflow a river", I still would have chosen you...

If He had told me, "our time spent together here on earth could be short", I still would have chosen you...

If He had told me, "this soul may one day make me witness overbearing suffering", I still would have chosen you...

If He had told me, "all that you know to be normal would drastically change", I still would have chosen you...

Of course, even though I would have chosen you, I know it was God who chose me for you...

Happy Birthday to the sweetest little boy I know.  I am so grateful to be your mommy and to be by your side through all of this.  I am so thankful that the Lord allowed you to be apart of our earthly family and to have you in our lives.  We will always love you!

You started out as 6 lbs 4 ounces of pure cuteness....

                               

Now weighing in at 19 lbs 6 ounces of pure cuteness.

Here's to Many Many More Birthdays!

Child Labor

Carter is my first baby.  I always tell him this.  I am constantly telling him to stop growing up, that I need him to be my baby forever.  Especially when he outgrows his pants in 2 months.  

Carter has really taken a liking to "helping."  He takes his jobs very seriously.  He has even started to tell us about his job that requires him to leave the house.  He announced to us one day that he now works in the Emergency Room as a Doctor and that he would be gone that night until 9.  He has spent a lot of time in the hospital granted, but I wouldn't trust his skills as an ER Doc.  When did my baby become old enough to hold a full time job?  Luckily his shifts at the hospital don't take him away from home too many nights a week.  He still has time to help around the house.  

He is a Jack of All trades

.  

Trade #1:  Shoveling Dirt

Grandpa brought a trailer of manure over one night and happened to have a kid sized shovel.  Carter spent over an hour moving dirt with his daddy and grandpa.  

 He was quite good with a shovel and managed to dump the dirt in the wheelbarrow over 97% of the time.

 After the manure was laid on the garden he grabbed a rake and carefully began to smooth the dirt.  In fact he still goes out daily and grabs the rake and does his "smoothing."

The best part about this job??  It is physically demanding and the night he shoveled for over an hour he slept in an hour longer than normal.  Hallelujah!  And then took a 2 hour nap that next afternoon.  I may require an hour of shoveling each day from him to get him to sleep like that more often!

Trade #2  Laundry

Since getting new machines that Carter can reach into, he has been eager to help transfer and load laundry.  Even better are the buttons that light up and make noises.

 Trade #3

"Hosin"  

 Carter loves to help Neil with anything that he's doing outside.  If Neil hoses off his bike, Carter hoses off his.  If Neil is fiddling with his bike rack, Carter is fiddling too.  This day Carter was helping Neil hose off the muddy car.  When I asked him what he was doing he replied "I'm hosin."  Enough said.

Trade #4 (Which happens to be my favorite)

And I quote again....

"Lawn Mowering"

 Carter picked up this old, faded Fisher Price lawn mower from my sister.  He saw it in their garage, immediately took a liking to it and played with it constantly while at their house.  Then he became his favorite person when she told him he could take the lawn mower home since her kids never played with it.
Not to worry, this toy doesn't sit around collecting dust around our house.  In fact, quite the opposite.  I'm afraid he is going to wear it right out.

He is dead serious about his need and desire to "Lawn Mower" the grass.  And wouldn't you know it, our lawn needs a good mowing 2-3 times a day.  The picture above shows Carter, in his pajamas mowing the lawn at 7 am.  He couldn't wait another minute to mow this day.  Good thing his lawn mower is silent, I doubt the neighbors would appreciate a wake up call like that.

 And this day I had just finished REAL mowing the grass and Carter came up to me and said "Mom, the lawn isn't looking too good so I'm going to lawn mower it again."  Thanks buddy.

I love to watch him lawn mower the grass.  I do really wish he could do it for us.........

You know the saying "All work and No play makes Carter a dull boy...."

So very true.  So Carter makes sure to take some time and play and be a 3 yr old boy.

 Jumping off the couch downstairs onto the beanbag is an all time favorite.  I hate the old, gross beanbag and would love to throw it away but Carter won't let me.

                                                             "To Infinity and Beyond"

He likes to be "Twins" with Jax and requests to wear the same outfit on occasion.  I bought them a couple of identical outfits, just because I thought they were cute.  Not to necessarily wear at the same time but Carter thinks it to be fun to be a Twin.

                                      
He is easy to please.  We woke up one Saturday morning to see the neighbor across the street having a garage sale.  And there on the lawn sat this picnic table. $5 later it was in our backyard with a little boy who wanted to eat anything and everything just to have an excuse to sit there.  I hope to avoid a dirty kitchen floor this summer by eating most meals outside!

                                       
He has recently taken a new found interest in our cat Kevin.  He wants to carry him around constantly while outside and calls him "Kevy Kev."

He has been saying some funny things lately.  This boy can eat and when I finally put my foot down and tell him no more food until dinner he will sweetly say "I will give you all of the monies in my money jar if you give me one more treat!"  If he owned more than 75 cents I would consider it.

After going to time-out or getting in trouble he will come and give me a hug and say "Mom are we still best friends?"  Or "Please don't ever be mad at me again Mom."  Or "Do you still love me Mommy?"  The answer to all these questions is Yes, I can't promise that, and More than Ever.

                                      
These pictures really melt my heart and show what a tender side this hardworking kid can have.  He got this stuffed monkey, named Monkey for his first Christmas.  They were inseparable for about 2 years and then Monkey kind of got booted.  Right after Jackson was born we suggested that Carter give Monkey to Jax so Jax could have company at the hospital.  Carter thought it was a great idea until he got to the hospital and the handoff time was here.  He decided that Monkey was his best friend and could not be parted with.  So Monkey re-established his role and bed sharer and best friend.  I will randomly find Carter and Monkey snuggled up together at random times and places.  Like the picture above.  They are watching a movie together.  Carter always has Monkey snuggled under his chin.

We sure love our hardworking boy.  We just wish all his "jobs" would bring in some money.  Make him start earning his keep around here.  That being said:  If you are in the market for some Shoveling, Laundry help, Hosin or Lawn Mowering please give Carter a call!